He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
