My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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