Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
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