I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
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