You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
