that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
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