if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
