i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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