I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
