Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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