wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
