K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
