I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
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