My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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