idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
