Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
