that's an acceptable place to lick
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
