when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
You've changed since you got that strap on
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
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