if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize