did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
