Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Buhtt sex?
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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