My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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