i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize