Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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