hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
i believe in u and ur pee
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Couch. On fire.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize
