she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I am never drinking with the goths again.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Randomize
