Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
