in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
