i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
i dont even know how to be here
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
