I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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