I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
