White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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