for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
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