I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Randomize
