3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize
