you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
