I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Randomize
