haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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