it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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