If that was your dad, he is hot
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
