I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Randomize
