I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
