But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i just had sex bonerless
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
