Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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