god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
