fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
