those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize