You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
we made out on top of his cat.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
