I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
