I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
